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Get Your Client/Interviewer to See Things Your Way

I’m sure that everyone has come across times when had to deal with someone who was being irate. Or perhaps you have been in a meeting with a client who would not see things in the appropriate light. Or maybe you were in an interview and just could not click with the interviewer.

Open Loops has a great post that helps you understand how to deal with these situations (and so many more). From their article, How to Deal With An Irate Person:

A better approach is called “Pace and Lead”. The first step is to match the complainant’s emotional intensity. This is not agreeing with the person. This is simply responding with the same emotions that are being presented.

The article goes on to explain that you then “Lead” the person to a calm state (or to the point-of-view you want him to see). This allows you to get in tune with the other person and bring them around to your level (hopefully a calm one).

Interestingly, Nicholas Boothman, in How to make people like you in 90 seconds or less, discusses this very tactic. Boothman refers to it as “synchronizing” with the other person. Once you synchronize your mood, body language, and emotions with the other person, you are able to lead them to a different place by subtly changing all these factors.

I’m sure that once this is mastered, it can be applied in many situations. Has synchronizing or pace & lead helped you out of a pinch? Please post a comment or drop me a line to share with us.

[tags]legal andrew, how to make people like you in 90 seconds or less, nicholas boothman, pace and lead, synchronize[/tags]

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5 Responses to “Get Your Client/Interviewer to See Things Your Way”

  1. Lungs
    September 20th, 2006

    Excellent, practical psychology. I will quite enjoy testing this one out.

  2. Andrew F
    September 20th, 2006

    Thanks for stopping by. I’m glad you enjoyed the article. Please fill me on if/when you get around to trying this out. I’m trying to use it myself. It’s harder than it sounds, though. (unfortunately)

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  5. [...] I especially liked his post Get your client/interviewer to see things your way. In this post he gives you some ideas on how to peacefully lead a person to seeing your side of things. Useful in law and in all other areas of human interaction. [...]

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