The good thing about getting frustrated with someone over IM is you can always press ALT+F4 and exit the messenger if you really get upset. Then, once calm, you can write an email explaining what you meant, rather than what you said (or was heard).

Just as long as the IM flame war doesn’t turn into an email flame war…I’ve had a few of those too.

- Eric.

Never fight over IM. Don’t even disagree, unless you have a communication mode with which to follow up–pretty much immediately–if you start to get annoyed.

A good rule of thumb is if you are irritated, better to take the conversation offline.

You’d think it would be common sense. You’re definitely on to something regarding anonymity. I think email and blogs feel impersonal in a way, and people forget that there are real people on both ends of these communications.

Another factor is the immediacy of communication with IM and email. It doesn’t give us time to think about what we’re doing or saying. With phones or in-person communication, there’s usually a natural delay, while waiting to find someone or get through on the phone. This gives us time to re-think our words and be a little nicer.

Thanks a ton for commenting,
Andrew

Actually, its intriguing to know that there is a need for courses like email etiquette and web etiquette… I find it really amusing. Isn’t this supposed to be pretty common sense? I read it somewhere that people tend to be more rude in emails and blog posts than in phone calls, or face to face meetings. Is the perceived anonymity on the web doing good for people?